


Before I Fade

by MidnightSorceress



Category: Mobile Legends: Bang Bang (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Character Death, Light Angst, M/M, Sad Ending, Short One Shot, Temporarily Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-15
Updated: 2018-11-15
Packaged: 2019-08-24 01:07:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16629980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidnightSorceress/pseuds/MidnightSorceress
Summary: Before I go,Let me hold you just once.Before I leave,Let me smile at you twice.Before I fade,Let me bid you goodbye,it's the only way I can tell you I've loved you before I die.





	Before I Fade

**Author's Note:**

> I'm weak when it comes to angst so I wrote a light angst instead, I don't really want to cry-   
> This one-shot may be painful, and I've made it so light to ensure no tears would be shed, and it's kinda rushed since my time is limited in using the phone so yeah.. I was unable to make this one-shot sadder. 
> 
> Enjoy anyways!

 

_Before I go,_

_Let me hold you just once._

The Moon Elf King glanced silently at the Son of The Dragon, looking down at his feet as soon as he saw how happy the other seemed to be. Even from afar, Estes could still hear Zilong's laughter, and although the voices of the other heroes were just as loud as Zilong's, in Estes' ears, Zilong's laughter cannot be overlapped. Out of all the voices Estes could hear, it had to be the one that owned his heart, someone that is not aware of his love, nor will ever even know.

He gently grazed his fingers upon the letters on his scroll, pretending to read the words when in all truths, he was only trying to get the brunette's image out of his head. He wanted to block Zilong's voice, wanted to make his unwanted feelings disappear, but he couldn't. 

He already tried, but he ended up falling even more, falling in a deep abyss with no one there to catch him, falling in the depths of something that should have been beautiful. Estes tried blaming Zilong for making him feel this way, but he found himself unable to.

So he blamed himself instead. 

He had fallen in love the moment the Fighter told him he was worth something, told him words no one told him before, and that stupid Fighter even gave him a sweet smile as he comforted Estes during one of his lamenting that no one should've known, but Zilong found him.

Estes wished Zilong hadn't found him.

His feelings were unspoken, they were unheard, and if it weren't for the stoic face he has, anyone would've figured he was in love, in love with someone who's too perfect for him. Someone so unreachable. He tried to ignore the painful lurch in his chest every time he sees Zilong being happy with someone else. Estes never felt what love was like, so when he felt it the first time, he didn't know it hurts. He didn't know it was painful, especially when the one you love doesn't know your feelings and already seemed happy.

Seeing Zilong laugh and smile from afar makes Estes realize just how much he can never be able to make the Fighter that happy.

He wanted to hold him, wanted to make him happy, give him everything he could, but how can he when Zilong's already happy? How can he when he couldn't even tell Zilong how he feels? How can he when he is not good enough?

He can only glance.

They've just returned from a battle that was not a game, they've won, and now they were celebrating. Estes felt sick just thinking of joining them, afraid that they'd be able to see past his mask and notice that he's upset. He really didn't feel like celebrating anyways, even if they had won, there were enemies that managed to escape and would most likely come back to taunt them.

"Your Majesty!" He lifted his head up and saw the Moonlight Archer who respected him so much. Estes gave a single nod, "Greetings." He murmured, loud enough for Miya to hear. Miya gave him a gentle smile, "You should be celebrating, it isn't everyday we'd win a battle against enemies stronger than us, my King." said Miya. Estes shook his head, "As much as I'd be gratified to join, I cannot. I'll be heading back to my chambers for a rest anyways, perhaps next time?" He responded, and Miya nodded at him.

"If you say so, but next time, you must join! Promise?" Estes nodded at her. "Promise." 

Miya left then, and it took Estes moments before he sighed and stood up, giving one last subtle glance at Zilong before turning his back and starting to walk.

Right when he exited, a voice called out for him. "Estes!" He knew who it was. He didn't turn after stopping his steps, not even when Zilong tapped his shoulder. He only turned when Zilong made him. Zilong gave him a grin, his cheeks tinted with a pinkish color that Estes knew came from the beverage the Fighter had been drinking, rum, was it?

"You were great at the battle!" Was what Estes heard from the Fighter. Unconsciously, Estes' own cheeks started to redden, "Thank you." was the only thing he could respond. 

"Thank you for healing me too, otherwise, I would've died." Zilong smiled sheepishly and Estes nodded dully albeit his heart was beating rapidly. "It was my pleasure." He glanced at Zilong's face, and couldn't help but feel the want to hold him. 

So he extended a hand to be shaken. "You have done excellently too." He said, and Zilong looked at his hand before he chuckled. Estes withdrew it, thinking he'd just been mocked. He blushed in embarrassment that turned to surprise when Zilong wrapped his arms around him and embraced him. 

He almost gasped, eyes widening at the warm feeling. It felt like heaven, soothing and so warm. He almost teared up, not wanting it to end. His trembling and unsure arms slowly and gently wrapped themselves around the other's bigger frame, tightening the hold Estes had dreamed of. 

 "Ah, I didn't know it feels this good to embrace you." Zilong cooed before Estes could. Estes sighed, "I know you're drunk.. and I will have to go soon, but before I go.." He tightened the embrace more. 

"...let me hold you just once." 

_Before I leave,_

_Let me smile at you twice._

The air surrounding them was filled with dread, filled with the disappointment of being reminded of how all they've done were all for naught. Estes was right to assume that the enemies that were able to escape would return seeking vengeance. 

They've been attacked once more, and they were unprepared. 

Estes was silently mourning the loss of his fellow Supports. The enemies that attacked them were after the Supports this time, for they've been lucky the last battle since the Supports were there to heal them, and outside the game, their healing abilities were stronger. 

It was understood why they were now after the Supports. 

His heart was broken into pieces upon finding out that Rafaela, Diggie, and Nana had already fallen, they were the most unfortunate ones, the most unsuspecting of all. They were outside for a stroll when they've been attacked and how Estes wished they could've done something to prevent it. 

Now, everyone was silently mourning for them, while others cried quietly. Estes stared blankly at his lap, wondering what Zilong must be feeling. He'd known Zilong one for sentiment, so he worried Zilong must be feeling worse like he is, if not, worst. He glanced at the Fighter, and found said Hero staring at him with eyes filled with.. 

Fear. 

"We.. we should hide the remaining Supports." Zilong blurted out as soon as Estes met his gaze. Estes felt his broken heart become relieved for a moment, not breaking the gaze he and Zilong shared. 

"We must." Hilda stated, and soon enough, everyone painfully agreed.

However, Estes didn't, and so did the other Supports. 

"If you wish to battle them, I will join." Estes uttered, earning everyone's gaze. Zilong was maddened by his statement that he even stood from his seat, "No! We're keeping the Supports safe. Including you, Estes." Zilong snapped. 

Estes was undeniably startled by it, but he kept his posture well. "Our fellow Supports died and we weren't able to do anything. What if when you charge, you'd die because we're not there to heal you? So you'd let us wallow in the pain of being unable to save the only ones we cared about?" Estes asked, staring at Zilong still. 

Zilong didn't want to listen. 

"But if you die-" 

"-then at least you'll live." Estes stated, making Zilong's eyes widen as a deep silence then ensued. Everyone was looking at them with the saddest look on their faces, and those who could no longer take it were already sobbing, being comforted by those who could still control themselves. 

"I will not let you die, Zilong.. nor anyone at all." Estes smiled softly yet sadly at the Fighter, and he swore he saw tears fill the Fighter's eyes. 

Zilong clicked his tongue then, looking away. His face turned gentle but still a little angry. Estes' smile disappeared for a moment, but he felt his heart shatter in more ways than one once again as he heard what Zilong yelled.

"You should give me smiles more often! You better make sure you smile at me before we fight.. you stubborn elf.." Zilong whispered the last part softly. 

Estes' smile returned, and Zilong saw it in his peripheral vision, so he turned to fully face Estes.

"I'll leave to prepare now." Was what he stated, knowing already everyone was going to prepare for battle at the moment. 

"But before I leave.." Estes gazed at him with worry and fear aching in his chest, hoping Zilong nor anyone would not die in this battle. 

"In times when we were safer, you should've let me smile at you twice." 

_Before I Fade,_

_Let me bid you goodbye..._

The battle had already started, and they were shocked at the number of enemies that appeared. They didn't know there were more, and it was getting even harder to fight.

The remaining Supports were receiving more of the wounds, being constantly attacked by the enemies while they were healing their comrades. 

Estes had the most injuries out of everyone. 

The enemies found out he was powerful in healing and they constantly attacked him. He was bleeding badly from numerous vital wounds that his healing powers could not heal, for his only objective was to give the healing to his comrades.

He could no longer stand, so he knelt. His knees were struck badly so that he wouldn't be able to move to every ally to heal them, so he pushed himself to his limits, making sure his healing powers reach everyone even the farthest. 

His sight was starting to blur, the pain was no longer bearable, but in spite being near to death, all Estes could think of was Zilong, and how much he regrets not telling Zilong of his feelings sooner. 

He looked for Zilong and found him about to be pierced in the chest- the heart, where a life could be ended quick. It would be so instant that Zilong may die despite Estes' healing him. His eyes widened, and before he knew it, he pushed himself to stand up with injured knees and ran towards Zilong. 

"Zilong!" He screamed, and he pushed the Fighter aside to receive the blow instead. 

The Enemy had been startled, and Estes ended up being stabbed by the spear in the chest violently, missing his heart but injuring a vital part.

The moment his chest had been pierced, it was like the world froze. The light of his healing powers disappeared and everyone felt it. 

The Moon Elf King has fallen. 

More blood went out of Estes' mouth while he weakly took the spear out, landing harshly on his back. He heard terrified screams, but the loudest of them all had been Zilong's. 

Zilong couldn't care about the fight going on, he just grasped Estes in absolute fright and madness, angry tears falling from his beautiful eyes. 

Estes couldn't hear the words Zilong was trying to tell him, and his sight was starting to darken, he couldn't find it in him to heal himself, he couldn't find his light.

His weak hand grasped Zilong's cheek, caressing them gently, and with the last life in him, he said what he should've said before.

"I-I.. love.. you..." 

And he was no more. 

_It's the only way I can tell you I've loved you before I die._

The loudest noise that followed had been Zilong's cry. 

_Before you've gone,_

_I should've held you more than once._

Zilong wasn't drunk, he just wanted to embrace him. 

_Before you've left,_

_I should've asked you to smile more than twice._

He didn't want Estes to come, because he wanted him to be safe.

_Before you've faded,_

_I should've been ready to bid you goodbye..._

When he held Estes in his arms, he was screaming that Estes would live, and he just died inside when Estes told him of the feelings Zilong thought he'd been the only one having.

 

_I never knew I'd be unable to tell you I love you.. and I shouldn't have let you die._

Zilong was already in love with him since the beginning. 

**Author's Note:**

> Mobile Legends does not belong to me, nor its characters. What belongs to me is the plot of this story. 
> 
> Ps. I told you it ain't that sad! I don't like heavy angst anyways since it's gonna haunt me forever eeekkkk TvT
> 
> Tell me what you think ❤ Thanks for reading!


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